pumpkins and sunflowers in autumnal spread

How to Survive Halloween as an Anxious Person

I love Halloween! I love the spooky stuff, the abundance of pumpkin-spiced-everything and the cold creepy nights. However, as someone who suffers with an anxiety disorder, I do know that not every Halloween activity suits people with anxiety problems. If you find this time of year nerve-wracking, or want to join in with social events but get nervous doing so, here are a few ideas of how to survive Halloween as someone with an anxiety disorder:

Horror Films

Scary films are a huge part of Halloween for some people and something that I often enjoy. However, on a bad anxiety day, they aren’t ideal, and you may well think that horror films sound like an absolute nightmare! (Pun slightly intended…)

The main thing is that you always feel like you can say no. If you don’t want to watch a scary film, just say no. Any real friends won’t mind and will probably change their plans to accommodate you.

popcorn with cinema ticket

If you feel like you can watch a scary film, there are a few things you can do to prevent extra anxiety. First, watch them at home. That way you can pause the film if you need to, you’re somewhere familiar, and you can leave some lights on too. Also, avoid particular triggers if you know you have them. For example, my anxiety is often triggered by medical scenarios, so I will often avoid films that are set in hospitals or similar. Lastly, have a quick self-check before the film starts. Are you in the right mindset to watch this film? Is there anything you need to make yourself feel more comfortable?

There are also plenty of films that are more ‘comedy spooky’, rather than full-on horror. Think ‘Hocus Pocus’! (Which I’ve never actually seen and desperately want to watch this month!)

Books

If you’re desperate to consume some Halloween-y media, but can’t stomach a horror film this year – why not try a scary book instead? The bonus of books is that you can close them and walk away very easily if you need to.

For a traditional ghost story, I would recommend The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson and for a superb psychological thriller I love Misery by Stephen King.*

The Haunting of Hill HouseMisery

Horror Mazes or ‘Scare’ Events

There’s a ‘scare village’ event near where I live that I really want to go to this year, but I sometimes really struggle with live-action horror events. Every year, you will see this style of horror event or maze pop-up. For example, the ‘Fright Night’ events at Thorpe Park. I have done these type of mazes before, but I’ve also avoided them before, so hopefully my advice can help you if you want to go to one of them.

First, remember that the actors are not allowed to touch you. You are completely safe and are in a controlled environment. Keep telling yourself that the whole event is completely fake and the performers and organisers are there to keep you safe, if a little scared.

Calm vs Panic signs with blurred beach background

Secondly, remember that you can always get out if you need toI have, on two occasions, left scary themed events early and on both occasions, staff were really understanding and accommodating. You won’t be the only person leaving early and you can always say you feel sick or unwell if you don’t want to say that it’s anxiety. A few years ago, I was in a queue to enter the ‘Chamber of Horrors’ section of Madame Tussauds in London and I just felt like I couldn’t go in. They had a sign that informed you that this was your last chance to leave before entry (check for these points – there may be some times when you won’t be able to leave, and you need to know that) and I decided to leave. I told a member of staff, told my friend, and we went to get some food instead! No one minded and it meant that I could take time to calm down and try a different activity.

You are always allowed to leave. Sometimes just knowing that escape is possible will be enough to calm you down!

Halloween Parties

If you’ve been invited to a Halloween party, then there are two important things to know:

  1. I’m very jealous of you. I love Halloween parties and no one I know ever throws them any more!
  2. You don’t have to go.

Number 2 is really the important one there, of course. If you’ve been invited to a party, you don’t have to go. Now, if you know that you have a tendency to hermit because of your anxiety, and you will actually have fun with your friends if you drag yourself there, maybe it is good to do just that. However, if you’re really panicking, don’t force yourself to go to a big party that scares you. If you do go, make sure you can get home early if you need to. Drive yourself, walk, or don’t rely on a hard party-goer for a lift home.)

Now… love fancy dress so I love dressing up for Halloween, but I know that it’s not everyone’s cup of tea and you might feel anxious about people looking at you. However, think of it this way – if everyone in the room is in costume, and you aren’t – who are people more likely to look at? If you’re not big into fancy dress but want to blend in, I’d suggest something easy and subtle like the traditional witch’s cat. Wear all black, put on some cat ears and make a tail out of black tights and scrunched up newspaper. Done! Also, this would be easy to hide during travel if you need to get public transport – just put the ears and tail in your bag until you get to the party. Similar ideas might be a witch (black dress, hat and broom) a devil (black and red clothes with devil horns and a pitchfork) or a vampire (more black clothes, pale make-up and some fake teeth.)

pumpkins and sunflowers in autumnal spread
Photo by Public Domain Pictures on Pexels.com

And if you’re friends really want to celebrate Halloween, but none of these activities are for you, why not suggest one of these:

  • Pumpkin carving
  • Halloween-themed baking (pumpkin traybake anyone? I have to try this one!)
  • Halloween crafts (do you have any young relatives you could do crafts with? most kids I know love Halloween and they don’t do anything too scary!)
  • A board game night with a spooky twist. (I’d recommend Plague Inc. which is a brilliant plague-themed game. You could also play Cluedo for some old-school murder mystery feels!)

And last, but by no means least, keep up your self-care. Perhaps by trying out the #SelfCareTogether challenge that Pigletish is hosting this month. Halloween is a very social holiday and you might be surrounded by triggers for your anxiety for a lot of this month – so make sure you are taking care of yourself, and having moments of calm whenever you can.

Happy Halloween!

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* Please note that Book Depository links in the post are affiliate links. They cost you no extra money, but if you buy a book through my affiliate links I earn a small commission.

A hand holds a hot chocolate with marshmallows next to an open book.

The Best Book Genres for a Cosy Night In

What do we want? A cosy night in! When do we want it? Now!

Oh yes, I am in full-on cosy mode. It helps that I’ve been ill this weekend so I’ve been wrapped up in bed most of the time anyway, but I am really in the mood for a long evening spent with a hot chocoloate, a fluffy blanket, and a good book.

A hand holds a hot chocolate with marshmallows next to an open book.
The three perfect ingredients: hot chocolate, fluffy blanket, good book.

Personally, I think there are some book genres that lend themselves to cosiness and Autumn evenings more than others, and in this post, I’ll be sharing my top 3 suggestions of genre, along with a few book recommendations.

All book titles are linked to their pages on the Book Depository website. I love the Book Depository and would always recommend it over other online book retailers. For full disclosure, please note that all links to the Book Depository in this post are affiliate links. This costs you no extra money, but means that if you buy the book I earn a small commission. 

1. Historical Fiction

Historical fiction is, for me, a go-to autumnal genre. Something about lavish castles, royal courts and family drama just gets me hooked for a long evening reading session. My favourite historical period to read about has always been the Tudor period, or the Elizabethan era. For that reason, my number one recommendation for a historical fiction read this Autumn is the Philippa Gregory classic, The Other Boleyn Girl. Far superior to any of the film adaptations, Gregory’s book is a romantic and mysterious read that will keep you turning the pages for hours on end. (Bonus TV recommendation: The Tudors! Who remembers that show? My absolute favourite!)

220px-Other_Boleyn_Girl

2. Fantasy/High Fantasy

Much in the same vein as historical fiction, the vast settings, sword fighting and elfish charm of fantasy is perfect for a cosy night of reading. Sometimes you can’t beat a dwarvish quest or a battle for the throne, and there’s something about classics such as Lord of the Rings that have that wintery feel to them. Plus, fantasy novels are usually quite lengthy books, which means you need the long winter nights to get stuck into them!

I would of course recommend the  Lord of the Rings trilogy, and The Hobbit. (How gorgeous is this box set?! I’ve got my on this for sure!)

The Hobbit & The Lord of the Rings Boxed Set

I would also recommend reading the A Song of Ice and Fire series, aka ‘Game of Thrones’. If you’re brave enough that is! These are weighty books, packed full of detail, but well worth the commitment if you can stick with them. Let’s just hope George R. R. Martin eventually gets round to writing the next book!

3. Chick Lit

As much as I have a few fundamental issues with the term ‘chick lit’ (perhaps a discussion for another day!) I do think that this lighthearted, feminine genre has a place on this list. When the cold dark nights are drawing in and the balmy summer evenings filled with mojitos are long behind us, a feel-good romantic comedy can be just the remedy.

The summer holiday reads you see advertised everywhere in July and August aren’t my first choice for a September read, but there are a lot of great ‘chick-lit’ titles out there that I like to reach for when I want a relaxing night in with a glass of wine and a bar of chocolate. My recommendation would be the ultimate in funny-girl icons, Bridget Jones.

Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason

There they are, my recommendations for a cosy night in of reading and relaxing. What would be your number one recommendation?

hugs

 

The Self-Care Sloth
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